Divorcing is a life event that can get very emotional, as any divorce attorney can tell you.

Yet as normal as having strong emotions during a divorce may be, they represent only one part of the divorce equation.

Divorce lawyers recognize that there are two separate components to a divorce: the emotional component and the process component.

Keeping the two separate with the help of an experienced and understanding divorce planning attorney is necessary to ensure a quick process that brings optimal results for all those involved.

The Emotional Part of Divorce

Divorce attorneys understand that getting a divorce is never pleasant and the emotions that occur naturally when spouses confront the reality that their marriage is ending can be intense.

As normal as these emotions may be at this time, it is still important to understand that they can negatively affect the process part of the divorce.

While it is important to express and deal with the emotions felt during this event in your life, it is important to work with your lawyer on keeping the emotional element separate from the process element of divorce.

The Process Part of Divorce

The process part of divorce deals with some things that can be emotional triggers, which is why divorce planning attorneys stress the importance of leaving the emotional element out.

Emotions like sadness, anger, and guilt can affect decision making and have a negative impact on the entire process component.

Some of the process elements that are best decided with a clear head with the emotions left out of the process for everyone’s benefit include:

  • Recognizing Personal and Marital Property - This part of the process requires considering what property was brought into your marriage and what property was obtained during it.
  • Dividing Marital Property - Since Texas is a community property state, spouses with the help of each one's divorce lawyer must come up with a fair and equitable distribution plan for that property which does not always mean a 50/50 split as there are situations that can affect what is considered fair and equitable.
  • Dividing Debt - Debt must be divided into personal debt and marital debt based on who took on the debt and for what reason.
  • Child Custody and Conservatorship - Divorce attorneys will help negotiate an acceptable custody, care, and visitation plan to present to the court for approval.

Emotional Overlap Can Cause Process Issues

Considering the points noted, it is easy to see how high emotions could slow down your ability to come to sound and fair decisions during the divorce process.

This is why divorce planning attorneys find that it is easier and more productive for everyone when touchy decisions can be discussed and made from a practical point of view rather than an emotional one.

Keep The Two Divorce Components Apart

Divorce lawyers know that ending a marriage is hard and there are many emotions to deal with when working through the divorce process.

They also understand from experience that allowing emotions to overlap into the process can make it even harder.

As challenging as it might be, do your best to keep the emotional and process components separate when divorcing.

Work with an experienced family divorce attorney who understands the emotional element involved and will help find workable ways to negotiate without allowing emotions to take over.

Schreier & Housewirth Family Law

1800 West Bowie Street, Suite 200-E
Fort Worth TX 76110



Gregory L. Housewirth is a Board-Certified Family Law Specialist practicing in Fort Worth Texas. With 30 years of family law experience, Mr. Housewirth has represented hundreds of clients in divorce, custody, CPS, modification, and grandparent cases. In addition, Mr. Housewirth is a qualified family law mediator and a member of Collaborative Law Texas, a practice group dedicated to promoting collaborative divorce in Texas.